…And Read All Over: How many shows do you write for?
Sicko Writer: I advise on many shows – Criminal Minds, Law & Order: SVU, Law & Order: Criminal Intent, sometimes CSI, and bit of NCIS here and there.
ARAO: So you’re not actually one of the writers? You just advise the writers?
SW: Right. See, what I do is look at the final script and make some minor adjustments.
ARAO: What kind of adjustments?
SW: Just a bit of tweaking. The regular writers never seem to have enough things like incest, child prostitution, incestuous rape, child prostitution rape, incestuous child prostitution rape – things like that.
ARAO: Uh huh. And how often do you add these elements in?
SW: Oh, you’d be surprised. Sometimes it seems like I have to add at least one of them into damn near every episode. The writers I work with usually come to me with episodes that are almost perfect – I mean so close – they just need that extra dead and mutilated child to push them over the edge.
ARAO: So you’re saying that these writers come to you with interesting episodes about dynamic and complex characters who speak with a dialogue that doesn’t merely describe their thoughts and actions?
ARAO: Uh huh. And then you add rape and/or incest?
SW: Or child porn! Whatever my muse tells me, you know? Gotta give the people what they want! I mean, there has to be someone like me in the writers room.
ARAO: It’s the story that never gets old.
SW: Well, don’t get me wrong. I have to mix it up. If I put incest on SVU one week, I might put it on Criminal Minds the next. I try not to be predictable.
ARAO: So next week’s episode of CSI might not have a rapist in it?
SW: No. No, there will definitely be a rapist in CSI next week.
ARAO: Well, before we get to spoilers, I think we should cut it off there. Thank you for spending time with us, Perverted Criminal Minds/Law & Order/NCIS/CSI Writer.
SW: It was my pleasure.
ARAO: I’m sure it was.